balance

Just found this pic from 1 year ago...what a reminder of how quickly the boys are growing (Coby has changed the most over the past year for sure)!

I am struggling so much right now with trying to find balance in my life. I told Darren that I feel like I can only concentrate on one thing at a time and do it well. I feel like some days I am an amazing wife, but my mothering is not so great on those days. Other times I'm being the mother that I really want my kids to have, but my house keeping is lacking. Sometimes my house looks terrific, but Darren and the boys are being neglected. I am desperately trying to figure it all out...how can I be good at all of these things at the same time? I want to and I know that I can, but I need to find a system that works for me. I've been doing a lot of soul searching lately on what needs to change so that I can be better in all areas of my life.

My time management has really stunk lately and I want to change it but honestly at times I just don't have the energy to do so! I want to get to a place where I feel proud of where I am and what I'm doing for myself and my family. I love my life, however, I feel like I need to find balance so I can enjoy it more! I want to learn to live in the moment, which is SO hard for me as I am a planner!!! I know I'll get there eventually because I feel such a strong desire to do so. With all that said, I have a few goals for the next few months.... To find balance. To live in the moment. To enjoy my boys in the stages that they're each in. To be here now and not worry about what happened yesterday or what is going to happen tomorrow. To spend quiet time each and every day reading my Bible. To be the best wife to Darren that I can be. To take better care of me (i.e. start working out again!).

I feel better now that I've written some goals for myself! Now that it's here, I have a reference point to see where I've been and where I'm heading....to look back in a few months and see just how far I've come.

I won this book at a Keeper's session that I went to this week. I'm going to read this daily during my "me time" until I make my way through it. I've already started it and it is really speaking to me and I know it's no accident that I won this book at this time in my life (let me tell you...I NEVER win anything!). It is all about everything that I've been struggling with over the past month. It's all about being the wife and mother that God created me to be.